None of us are fucking perfect. We’ve all done shit we regret. We’ve all chosen the greater of two evils in a situation. We’ve all acted out of selfishness or fear and we’ve all hurt someone that was close to us one way or another. So, how do we accept our failures without feeling defeated? How do we grow and learn from our mistakes and forgive ourselves instead of letting it consume us?
There’s one thing that you need to understand about fucking up. Everyone does it. We are all human. We all make mistakes, whether it was our intention or not. And that humanity is what deems you forgivable and worthy of redemption.
I’ve spoken a lot about writing out pros and cons or writing down the mistakes I’ve made and how I would choose better in the future. This works for forgiving yourself for your mistakes as well.
Accepting failure without feeling defeated means that you have to forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know before you knew it and redeeming yourself by choosing better the next time; by living better for the future. Changed behavior is the sincerest form of apology. If you are willing to change, you are worthy of forgiveness.
The truth is that it’s easier to forgive someone else for hurting us than it is for us to forgive ourselves. But our own self forgiveness is the most important. If we can’t hold ourselves accountable and use our mistakes as learning experiences, then we will stay damaged holding on to our regrets. It will be harder for you to accept other’s faults and wrong choices. It will be harder to love yourself and ultimately anyone else.
Forgive yourself for your failures and mistakes. Aim to do better. Redeem yourself through changed behavior and changed ways of thinking.